What Abortion Does to Us

I wrote this several years ago, and obviously before Roe was overturned.

The case against abortion rightly focuses on the harm to the unborn. But what does the abortion culture do to us?

It desensitizes us. I hardly need illustrate this point. A comedienne recently celebrated abortion via patriotic parody on Netflix. Basically nice people put on vagina hats, put vagina hats on their minor female kids, march them along to protest in the streets, enjoying the tribe vibe, then go back to work and school and friendly society sure of their moral superiority while nurturing a constant state of rage against their family and friends who believe that life is a right belonging to all human beings.

It dehumanizes us. We keep our human status, but we lose the context for what it is to be human. We lose the criteria for deciding what being human is. We lose that because we trash it. We must, if we decide to create castes in which some humans are human and some are not. If personhood must be relative, then we will end by re-evaluating all persons’ personhood, according to what scale I try not to imagine.

It makes us elitists. When we throw in with abortion culture and accept it as necessary, we reveal that we are rank elitists because we have decided that we have the right to declare who is human and who is not, who is a person and who is not, who is “viable” and who is not. Viability is an arbitrary and ever-shifting goalpost if there ever was one. And if the doctor was incorrect about viability, he will sometimes impose non-viability without prejudice. This happens. We decide who lives and who dies.

Abortion infantilizes us. When we grow up, we learn that things happen which we didn’t plan for. Sometimes we should have forseen the consequences of our actions, and sometimes unforseen things present themselves regardless of our actions. Whichever the case, we must meet life’s challenges, take responsibility, and make the best outcome we can, though perhaps no possible outcome is what we would have chosen. Life isn’t perfect.

The abortion culture has taught us that if we face a challenge that we find too great, or even too inconvenient, there is a panacea  which will take our circumstances right back to where they were before that interruption. No consequences are tolerated, and if there are consequences we must be victims of an oppressor. Blame must be assigned. We have learned to expect life to clear itself up so we can get back to our comfort. It’s a childish perspective. The abortion culture makes us children.

Abortion culture makes us relativize killing. Is abortion killing? Is this a human, is this living? Is this kind of killing justified? How can I make this killing OK?

It’s a bad place to find ourselves.

Abortion destroys us. A culture which endorses abortion destroys itself. Proverbs 8:36 declares: Those who hate me love death. That culture has put death on the menu. It has made death one essential option. And once we approve of death as a tool, an instrument of expedience, a means to an end, we cannot put it away. We give death a kind of life and it may have its way with us.

Heroic Help That Doesn’t Cost Me Much

“Hey, anybody out there who needs to go camping in another state, I will totally pick you up and drive you to the campsite and you can sleep on my spare cot to recuperate too!”

But I’m not seeing anything like the following from the same people:

“ Hey, anybody having a crisis pregnancy, I will drive you to your OB appointments and help you find material support for you and your baby! I will be around to babysit and be a friend!”


Why haven’t heard this one before?

After all, if LOVE IS LOVE is a sufficient proof for the equivalence of all human sexual relationships

Then LIFE IS LIFE is a sufficient proof for the equivalence of all stages of living human development–

The life of a toddler, a newborn, a baby in utero, or a human embryo.

Several Great Pro-life Proofs

”The implication of Prelogar’s argument was that the right to abortion is more than a right to “terminate pregnancy” or reject parenthood. As she herself said in the argument, part of the goal is to allow the woman not “to have a child in the world.” The intention in abortion, then, isn’t to remove a child from the womb but to make the child no longer exist. In the view of many abortion supporters, the right to abortion is the right to a dead baby. A National Review editorial put a fine point on it: “Abortion is valuable—it has constitutional status—because it lets mothers and fathers come as close as scalpel and poison can bring them to pretending they were never parents at all.’”

Keeping Peace with Moral Nightmares

Trying to keep relationships open, pleasant, based on our common humanity. That sometimes requires the avoidance of uncomfortable topics, especially ones which others could see as confrontational.

Of course. I don’t want to be the mean one.

But it occurs to me that I am really trying to keep the peace with people who believe that killing the unborn is not only permissible but necessary and righteous, that it is a good thing. People who rationalize the atrocity of abortion.

Why am I doing this?

Chronic Dairy


It’s settled. I’m not going to my son’s wedding. I find I am resenting having to explain, to…justify not being there. Would I get the same responses if I had cancer? MS?

It’s all you have to do-ism.

Breakfast: tuna salad, bone broth. Lunch: homemade minestrone, hardboiled egg. I made the minestrone myself in the crock pot two days ago but I could not have done it today.

A year ago today, I was diagnosed with shingles. That lasted through April. Here I remain, in bed. I would gladly return to simply shingles.


I felt dreadful today. I cannot figure out why.

Spoke to the person at rehearsal dinner venue and chose the menu.


I am forced to be my own advocate. That hurts and costs precious energy. Some people are so severe they do not have that energy available.

“But if this med doesn’t work, you will just have to come in.” Like thats an option I’m just preferring not to use. Like that is an option. This from a medical provider.

I am definitely getting the impression I will have to justify myself to people, to prove I’m really ill. Do you know another condition that requires justification? So my hardly able to leave my bed for a year doesn’t do it for ya?

Have felt variations on dreadful all week. I can usually identify the trigger. I’m at a loss.

OK, I have learned something more. I am having a crash because of the extended but minor infection with which I didn’t feel fatigued, but I crashed a few days later. God keeps showing me new things about this illness I’ve had for 28 years.


Yesterday my brother called. I knew why before he said anything. It was to tell me I should go to my son’s wedding. Oh snap, why didn’t i think of that? He tried convincing me I’m just depressed and I should get over it. I explained that I would hardly miss my child’s wedding because I’m nervous about traveling; I’m sick. I have a real diagnosed illness. He started challenging me: oh really, what is it? if you take a blood test will it show up? in other words: Prove it!

I declined to prove it. I told him I would send him something to read. I did, to read, to watch. The information is not equivocal. If he isn’t convinced after considering what I sent, it’s just not my problem.

I have had this thing for almost 30 years and nothing has changed in that time. There is no cure, not much in the way of treatment, no serious research money…and even though the CDC and the NIH and the Mayo Clinic and SCIENCE disagree, there is no widespread understanding that this is a real illness, just like cancer and MS. Your relatives are made uncomfortable by your stubborn refusal to get better in a reasonable period of time. We should feel for them, poor things.

A friend in a social media group for people with ME had the best response to his challenge: The fact that I am not going is your proof that I’m sick.

And that’s enough about that.

Diary will continue in future posts.

And No Religion Too-hoo

I recently joined a FB group for people who share the same illness I have been managing. This particular group has a ”no religious content” stipulation in its rules. Ok, I thought. I’m just here to glean helpful info and don’t plan to evangelize the group.

This morning, this post came across my feed:

FYI the ‘no religious content’ rule also covers the use of religious iconography and religious emojis such as the Buddha’s head and praying hands. These are harder to catch by the admin team so we might miss them in a thread but that doesn’t mean that they are allowed. Comments containing religious emojis will be removed by the admin team.

This was in response to this post by a member:

Hello admin.

Sincere apologies that I did the icon with 2 hands together. I meant it as a thank you gesture and did not see it as religious.

My mistake.

In Japanese it means please or thank you. Young people use it for that rather than religious. Also Hand together emoji Meaning. Depicting two hands pressed together and fingers pointed up, Folded Hands is variously used as thanks, request, and greeting as well to express such sentiments as hope, praise, gratitude, reverence, and respect.

Thanks for pointing it out to me. I simply had no idea.

Several comments posted in which members say they use the emoji all the time, though they’re atheists, simply as a heartfelt thank you. One person explained the precise translation of ”Namaste,” which is not religious, and is used widely the world over with this gesture.

The Admin replied:

It can have any of those 3 meanings: high five, thank you, or prayer.

We can’t always tell what the intent is, so just ask folks not to use.

Followed by:

An admin turned off commenting for this post.

If I take time to muse about these exchanges, my mind reels. But I’m going to sit with this awhile and probably write a follow-up post.

What are your thoughts?

Unconnected Thoughts

Cancelling is the world’s response to offense. The world’s yardstick is very short. Sympathy, understanding, forgiveness and hope is God’s response to offense. But we should remember his response is also perfect justice.

Note what Jesus tells parables in response to! Notice context. His parable is often in response to an exchange or comment before, and the connection is not always apparent unless you are noticing. We tend to parse Scripture but we can learn much by stepping back and taking in a wider view.

The way of the world is suffering. Jesus came into our world to be subject to it just as we are. He remained subject to this world we had made, remained subject to its political machinations, up til his death.

We cannot know God fully, but we are known by him fully, thank God. We can pray He will reveal himself to us, and to others…rather than shoehorning Him into our little box and presenting Him as such.

What Have I Learned?

God has answered every prayer. Small things matter.

This illness is a huge ferocious bear and I simply have no choice but to obey it.

Mindfulness. After almost a year trying, I still find it difficult to be still, meditate, keep my thoughts on my breathing, to get into a habit of dismissing pesky thoughts in order to to focus on my breath, etc. I also still fail to see the benefit. I understand learning techniques to calm down but I do not agree that avoiding thinking about difficult things will accomplish that. I would rather learn to encounter uncomfortable thoughts and learn to live with them or resolve them.

I like to think. And freaking out for a little helps.

Know you are suffering. Honesty with yourself is essential and it can take time to get there. Recognize the awfulness of your situation and proceed from there.

God is with me. He is going through my suffering by my side. I don’t know why I’m stuck here but I do trust Him.
I long for the day when I will look back and see that this suffering has been redeemed.

More thoughts to come.